Thinking about labels…

I’ve been thinking about labels…

it’s dead easy to label our children…

this is ‘the musical one

this is ‘the quiet one

she’s ‘just like her Dad


but how much do we think about how those labels stick..?

What labels were you given as a child?

Were you

the shy one

the fussy eater

the messy one


How much has that shaped your opinion of yourself?

So often, we hear and then take on, these childhood messages so that we are constantly (consciously or not) living up (or down!) to them – even in adulthood…

How is this holding on to this label working out for you?

Sometimes even seemingly positive labels such as

the clever one

can cause us problems – see Carol Dweck’s work on fixed vs growth mindsets – link to YouTube.

Next time you catch your inner voice saying

‘I’m always [clumsy/messy/….]’


‘I’m no good at [cooking/talking to new people…]’

or even

‘I don’t like [olives/flying/…]’


Trying something new

(see my last blog for more on olives – Trying something new…!)

ask yourself

‘how do I know?’
‘what evidence do I have?’
‘how old is that evidence?’

What is your experience of being labelled?

What beliefs are you holding on to? How is holding onto this belief or this label working out for you?

Let me know by adding your comments below..

To find out how I can help you challenge potentially unhelpful beliefs you may have, please get in touch via the contact form or call me on +44 7526 740486.

Best wishes!


6 replies
  1. Julie Evans
    Julie Evans says:

    Very true! Especially at a young and formative age.
    I was “the older sister”.
    On reflection this has probably influenced my feelings towards responsibility, whether that be to embrace it or to rebel against it.

  2. Karen
    Karen says:

    I was ‘wrongly’ labelled the messy one when I shared a bedroom with my sister as a child (I swear it was her mess on my side of the room!). Perhaps as a result of this I now file/organis everything (bedding, towels, tins in a cupboard, knickers in my undies drawer!!). And don’t ask what happens if a CD is not put back in alphabetical order!?!?!?


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